Temecula Valley [ family portrait ]

Shared Wisdom

Mom launches business to help other moms

By Amy Bentley

Traci Gaffney, a mother of three, knows a few things about raising kids. This year, the Temecula resident launched her own home-based business called "A Loving Way" to share her parenting wisdom and philosophy with new moms, expectant moms and parents with children of all ages.

Gaffney is a coach and wellness advocate for children and adults. She works with parents who seek to develop intuitive parenting skills during pregnancy and beyond. She serves up insight on topics such as pregnancy, breastfeeding, adjusting to a new baby, sibling rivalry, sleep deprivation, and good nutrition. She is active in the PTA at Crowne Hill Elementary School in Temecula, has been a classroom volunteer for 13 years and writes the Family Forum column for Temecula's monthly Neighbors Newspaper.

Gaffney worked in the legal field before having children, but motherhood changed her focus. Her kids are now 5, 9 and 17. "I'm more like a mom on a mission. I take practical experience, read a lot and go to workshops regularly. I'm constantly taking in new information for my own use and to share with others in a practical way," she says.

Gaffney hopes to raise awareness of the importance of connecting with and understanding children, beginning before birth. She draws from her own life experiences of mothering, marriage, divorce, single parenting, and co-parenting to help others create a life of love, acceptance and confidence rather than anger, disconnection and loss.

For more information, visit A Loving Way online at alovingway.com <http://alovingway.com/>  or call 800.647.1171.

Q: What led you to develop "A Loving Way?"
Traci Gaffney: When I was pregnant, people would comment on my close relationship with my babies. They started asking me to share this with other people and to help teach this to others, how to create a close bond during pregnancy and after.

Q: What kinds of extra support do pregnant women and new mothers need?
A: It helps when moms can take some time before their baby is born to sit down and figure out what areas they would like some help with, then come up with what I call a "support plan," like having someone watch the baby for an hour if they haven't gotten any sleep. My philosophy is: take the time to ask for help, support and love from other people so you can take care of yourself and get some rest. That helps with bonding, so you can seize the moment to welcome your baby into the world, and not be stressed out.

Q: Please tell Inland Empire Family readers about your parenting workshops.
A: My first workshop is called "Bonding with Baby Before Birth." People don't generally know what prenatal bonding is when I talk to them about it. Part of my job is to expand that awareness. A bond with your child is something you can never, ever break. Topics include the importance of bonding with the baby before birth, how to do it, and what it feels like to be in the womb. I want to help women find more joy in pregnancy and learn how easy it is to incorporate great nutrition as well. I developed this workshop after I had my second and third children. I figured out what I needed and what worked, and came out with some practical ideas. I also read a lot of books, including my two favorites, "The Secret Life of the Unborn Child," by Dr. Thomas Verny and John Kelly, and "Giving the Love that Heals: A Guide for Parents," by Harville Hendrix and Helen Hunt.

Other workshops I'm developing are "Bonding with Baby During Birth" and "Bonding with Baby After Birth." Topics will include what babies need emotionally during the birthing process, whether a woman should use an epidural or not (I've delivered with and without an epidural), and dealing with sleepless nights.

Q: You also meditate and offer a free meditation hour in your home each month. Why do you believe meditation is important?
A: Meditation centers you and grounds you. It creates an inner calm. It allows you to breathe and take a moment for yourself away from all the hectic things in life. It creates a peaceful state from which to parent. My kids love to be around me when I'm doing it. The meditations I do are active, such as shaking and dancing meditations, physically doing things to release energy, and then you sit and are quite for a while. I have been doing meditation for more than a year and am working on becoming a certified meditation practitioner.

Amy Bentley of Temecula is a regular contributor to Inland Empire Family.